Thursday Morning

Today I am in a MUCH better mood than I was in Monday, Tuesday and Wednesday. THANK GOD!! I am not usually an unhappy person. When I am unhappy.. I tend to be.. a bitch. I am sorry. However, I have decided that everything that has debased how I was feeling along with my outlook on everything.. is not worth it. I need to stop feeling so.. adverse to how I would normally feel when a situation that I am not comfortable with presents itself. Therefore, it's over, it's done, I'm movin' on.

SO!

I am getting into American Idol. I watched it in high school, when keeping up to date with reality tv was the approved, popular thing to do. Then I stopped because I just didn't have time (and frankly, watching Roseann was something I was more interested in) nor did I care much. Last night completely changed all of that. I am now interested in what entertainment American Idol has to offer simply because Ellen DeGeneres is the new judge and I love her.
Last night offered a certain level of amusement that I was not displeased with (even tho Ellen has yet to make an appearance). The girl who auditioned from Tennessee was one of my favorites. I can't wait to see what happens to her. I also find it quite amusing when I attempt to eradicate my very northern accent and try a southern accent on for size. It doesn't fit. But, like I said, I am looking forward to seeing where this bridge jumper, southern belle goes.. and if she actually has talent... ??

For a while, during lunch with Casey, we saw a flock of birds that would circle the office.. or the general location of the office.. at least 7 times. Casey and I would sit and wonder what kind of birds we circling the office and where on Earth did they come from?!?! My all knowing Granny told me the answer. They are, apparently, seagulls. Which takes our dove theory and throws it down the toilet.. with the excitement of wonder following close behind (I know, sad that we actually spent so much time wondering.. and it actually gave us a small degree of excitement).

I have a ginormous laundry list of things I need to do to get my life back on track. There are certain things, and certain goals I have that maintain a higher significance than others.. and I admit that quite often, I get off track. I also feel extrememly overwhelmed. There was a time, not long ago, that I thought (convinced myself) that I was where I needed to be and I knew where I was going.. with the rest of my life. That, obviously, did not work out. People traveled in and out of my life, interestes changed, values changed, my expectations rose and my interpretation of a healthy relationship proved wrong. So I am picking myself up, dusting myself off and attempting a new, improved, rendition of the meaning of happiness and fulfillment. wish me luck.

Some of the typical randomness:
-I got ready in 30 minutes this morning. A new record considering a shower was involved.
- Something smells awful.. I've sprayed Febreeze like eight times, it has yet to cease.
-My hair looks awful today
-I am tired and I shouldn't be
-I love Matt Nathanson's voice. Which makes me think.. that I need to find someone with a deep voice, I think they are sexy.


Thats all I have for now. I hope you ALL have a good day, even if I don't like you =)